I got this knot on the back of my neck about 10 days ago...it doesn't go away so I waddle down to the dr. office yesterday. He looked at it and offered "thats looks like a knot on your neck"...then he tried to drain the neck/hump...nothing would come out...so he gave me a prescription for amox-clav 875 mg twice daily. (after seeing the size of these pills, I assumed this medication is also use by large animal vetenarians for elephants and horses). He said to soak my neck with Epsom salt wet hot towel solution everynight.... and let him know if I am still alive in a few days.
after the Epsom salt recommendation talk, I thought he might add "and bury a stolen dish rag and some chicken feathers in the back yard on the full moon."
Anyway, it's about 4:30 am and I am sitting here with a wet towel of epsom salt wrapped around my neck.
Film at 11
14 comments:
I have a "hunch" you'll be just fine... and p.s. the stollen dish rag burial ceremony doesn't work... I tried that to fix a loose stool problem I was having a while ago to no avail...
Hump on my neck
[Beevis and Buthead]
"hhe..hu..heh...huh...hump ... te .. hee... eh.. hha .."
Did P-Lou find this doctor for you?
I must warn you that she doesn't really do much research when finding medical help.
I recently found out from a client (who works in medicine) that the family doctor P-Lou sent us to growing up has a reputation in the medical community as "a moron who will kill you. Seriously, I'm not even sure that guy went to med school."
Just a heads up.
I wish I were joking.
Really? I told Victor that he needed to go to a REAL doctor - because this guy is just a "sports medicine" dr. - whatever that means. And this hump is not a sports injury. When he told me that the guy went to med school, I gave him the example of that family doctor you just described - and told him that dr. didn't even know what M.S. stood for.
D Unit, the directions on the Epsom Salts box said they could also be used for constipation - but sounds like that wouldn't have helped your problem either.
I appreciate the advice valencia...I am always leary of Plou's medical advice....she is one of the few people I have ever known that reads and believes "possible side effects" on med bottles.
PS: got in trouble yesterday at work.... I was reprimanded for shouting back at a group of hecklers in the hallway "I GOT YOUR HUMPY THE WHALE RAT HERE!!"
Hey Dad...let the group know how the hump is .....humping?
This just in from the CDC:
CAMEL FLU: One new case now reported in El Paso County
As of today, April 30, 2009, Colorado has two lab-confirmed cases of swine flu, one each in Douglas and Arapahoe counties, according to the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment. The two affected people are recovering. There is greater concern about a new case of Camel Flu reported in El Paso County. The patient appears to be suffering from a "dromedarius (one hump) strain" according to the CDC. Universal precautions should be taken by anyone coming in contact with this patient. Doctors have not yet seen this strain in humans and are not sure how to proceed. Quote one unnamed, perplexed source in the medical community: "whatcha gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside that hump?"
I've always sorta been facinated (or perplexed) by p-lou's knowledge of current hip-hop lyrics... be it back in the day with her "Doing the butt" dance... the occassional reference to "big ups to brooklyn" and now she's able to remix some Fergie lyrics into a CDC report... amazing... simply amazing...
The good thing for Ribberd is that one time while everyone was outside and I came in to get a drink of water, P-lou was in the kitchen making lunch or something when she said,
"I like big humps and I can not lie, when Rib walks in with his itty bitty waste and a round thing in your face I get sprung" She said.
"Sprung" p-lou? what do you mean by that" I asked while squeezing a lemon into my water.
"i'm hooked and I can't stop staring, oh ribby I want to get with ya, and take your picture.. my homegirls tried to warn me but that hump you got makes me so horny" She continued
"Whoa! p-lou" I said while acting like I just got pushed back by a gust of wind "settle down.. “ But by this point it was obvious she was just getting started …
"So ladies (yeah), Ladies (yeah) Do you wanna roll in my Mercedes (yeah)
Then turn around Stick it out Even white boys got to shout Ribby got hump!" P-lou exclaimed... then she did this Michael-Jackson-esk quick leg whip move - screamed "OOW!" and then went back to preparing lunch.
It was something that has stuck with me for a really long time.
Thanks, I think. I sometimes tell my students, "Yea, I invented Hip Hop." They usually have a shocked look on their faces when I tell them, the look of someone who never entertained the idea that hip hop was invented by an older, white woman.
... cos I ain't your average groupie
I am always amaze at PLou's memory for hip hop and rap music...but she also knows that whole song from "you got trouble in river city"....I have never known anyone that know both rap and clasical stage songs! PS: my hump is getting smaller daily..but you know it aint the size that counts........
PS for those keeping score..my hump my hump my lovely lady hump..is dwindling.
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