Living Well on a "Fuxed" Income

Ok, all you bottled wine snobs, I learnt that there's a less expensive wine for your dinner hosts (when those hosts are Barry & Boan) than that pricey box wine on which Vic typically splurges.

Stuff I Learnt 14 Years Ago...

I learnt that you had to put on chains before going over a mountain pass near Trinidad, CO. (I didn't say I learned HOW to put on chains.)

Tire Chains

Ok, Patty-Lo...here are some more pics of putting on tire chains....for those who have never had to do this...including Todd & me!

We start over the Donner Pass at midnight, light snow falling...get to mile 72 and the snow is a little deeper....but on the pass they don't fool around and the DOT for NV get to call mandatory chains when they feel it is necessary. No foolin'...blockades are up with people checking your car to see if you have chains,snow tires or 4wheel drive before you can pass. We had the Mighty Honda Element, no problems there....but Todd was driving the U-Haul and we started to worry...but hey, no worries...they ain't gonna let you pass! You get to pull over at KINGVALE exit and purchase chains at the one and only gas station for double the normal price...but who is going to complain at that time of the night ( technically morning now )? We get our "bag o'chains" and try to figure out how to put them on...no easy task, but while you are in the cab of the truck trying to stay warm, you can discreetly peek out your windows and watch the other people fumbling around trying to figure it out in the cold,wet snow. We got them on....now what to do with this "extra" piece of metal? kinda like an allen wrench....ahhh! this is what you use to tighten the chains down with....good to go!

Then there is another guy waiting by the on ramp to check you out ...make sure you have the chains on...and away you go....for 13.6 miles until the chain control is done...then you hop out and take 'em off the tires....now what to do with 245 / 70 /19.5R chains???? sell them on craigslist!!!

$20 makes him a happy man....

I never knew how much Todd wanted a fake tree for his office until this morning. At 8:30am (Sparks,NV time) I was drinking my cup of coffee and cruising craigslist.org and found THE tree..showed the pic to Todd...called the lady who had just listed the tree at 8:06am....and we were on our way....7 miles later and $20 poorer (or much,much richer in Todd's eye) we have ourselves a lovely 8' silk ficus tree!

So I learnt today that Todd is really into fake trees (no watering or dying plants for him) and he has discovered the world of craigslist.org....we went one step further and put our tire chains and kayak on the website...we will see if we can make someone as happy as Todd is today!

We all make mistakes....

I learnt that if you've been managing the banking / finance department of a company for the past 4 years but really weren't quite sure how your employees did what they did on a daily basis and one of them is going out on maternity leave - DON'T volunteer to cover for them. Even though it might seem logical to finally learn what you're responsible for - don't. You've made it 4 years - no reason to start now.

Now, despite some suggestions (cough*expletive) to the contrary - on my last review my "Productivity" was cited as being "Outstanding." Now, despite the fact that my boss, who conducted the review, doesn't speak much English and isn't around that much is irrelevant - my review was stellar nonetheless and who am I to argue? he's a brilliant man and I've always subscribed to the "less is more" management philosophy.

That being said, over the past few weeks I've learnt that 'working' (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/working) is not all it's cracked up to be and actually takes away from more important things like blogging and checking MSNBC.com, ESPN, etc., every few minutes just in case there was a link or story I missed 5 minutes ago.

"Looks like we got ourselves a college boy..."

I learned again on Thursday that you’re never too old to learn – and that maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks. (Pick your favorite cliché.) Victor has been awarded a scholarship to finish his education (from where he left off 30 years ago). The school district for which he works is rewarding his good efforts in turning around today’s youth (“You don’t have a lunch pass. Turn around and go back in the building.”) with an opportunity to pursue his bachelor’s degree in education. The application included four letters of recommendation and an interview of eight questions. I figured he had beaten the competition when he told me his answer to a question about an adversity he had overcome in his life. His answer started (read in Vic’s voice): “Well, ya know, I’m from the South….”

flying and washing......good fortune learnt

sometimes good things happen to us........out of the blue ............for no apparent reason.......we should make it a point to remember these things so when the shithitsthefan it all balances out:

a week or so ago I was on a plane trip sitting in 22C which is the last seat on the aisle .....which doesn't lean back because the bathroom is there..and stuck in a seat next to two other losers......who happened to be speaking in tongues and glancing at me after every other word like I was the topic of conversation..........and these chaps were eating some god awful mystery food that appeared to have been sacrificed a few weeks ago and left to cure open air.........I had sat there for 1-1/2 hours which was about 1/2 the flight and felt like 17 days..... when a flight attendant leaned over and I swear I thought she was going to kiss me........whispered in my ear....no shit ........like we had a conspiracy going on "would you like to move up front...we have seat 1C open and only one person on that row." I hollered "WOOD EYE?????" and inquired if my carry-on bags could make the move too....she said "no problem"...and got my bags..I jogged up front...stretched out...and life was good....... put my free headphones on and watched the Food Channel the rest of the trip

Then last week I went to a self service car wash......pulled in the bay and found 3 American quarters stacked neatly on the control panel waiting for me to pick them up and use them to wash my dirty ass van. Which I did.

I think this is probably just all good karma finally catching up with me after years of neglect. But I am going to make an effort to remember and enjoy it.

I Done Learnt a couple things yesterday .....

I learnt last night while attempting to renew my cell phone plan that there are “Web Only” deals, or deals, rates, plans, discounts, etc., that you can only get on the internet. Which makes sense right. However, I learnt that there are also “Phone Only” deals that you can only get over the phone. In addition, there are T-mobile stores that offer “Store Only” deals. So when I went online I found what I wanted and still had some questions – so I called and by calling I got the “Phone Only” deal which was better than the “Web Only” deal – so I got an additional 500 minutes per month than the “Web Only” deal offered for the same price and got an additional $20 off the phone, and avoided the “Mail in Rebate” that was part of the “Web Only” deal. “You can only get a deal like this if you order online” yeah but they don’t tell you that you can get a better deal by calling in.

I also learnt last night watching the History Channel that Native American’s are actually from Asia / China? This seems like something I should have learnt a long time ago no? Apparently they came here 10,000 - 15,000 years ago either by sea or over the ancient land bridge. Anyone know anything else about this? My wife is actually 1/8th Native American (honestly) but I quizzed her last night and she doesn’t speak a lick of Chinese.

ReChimping

Yesterday, while listening to NPR, I learned a lot about chimps and retirement. Some folks have noticed chimps are too human-like to be destroyed with the same disregard afforded other animals, so a chimp retirement home,“Chimp Haven”, has been opened in Louisiana for retired chimp actors and medical research subjects. Overly-socialized chimps are given an opportunity to “rechimp” here. Don’t you just love that word/ concept? I notice that Victor regularly rechimps - especially on the weekend when he is able to shed his work attire and don some less-restrictive garments. Sundays are a prime (or perhaps primate) opportunity for rechimping. This afternoon Victor will don his Jeff Gordon tshirt and shorts and grunt at the Nascar race on TV while eating chicken wings
and flinging the chewed bones around his cage, I mean the living room.
By the way, Cheeta at age 75 is the oldest living retired chimp actor, and he lives in Palm Springs at the C.H.E.E.T.A. resort where he drinks lowfat banana smoothies (he is diabetic), watches old movies on TV, and paints (“ape-stract” style). Boan and Bae-bo, does this sound familiar???

Here goes nothing....

November 16, 2008

Is America great or what?

Are yall ready for the race Sunday in Vegas? Iam.

The best ever Egg nog

I have been meaning to share this with you........back a few months ago......valencia told us that we should try this egg nog called Morning Fresh Old Style Egg Nog at WholeFoods. well I did and it was the best egg nog I have ever had.....and it came in a glass milk bottle which takes me back to my childhood days...(so of course I saved the bottle) ..and it is from a place in colorado named Bellvue..and has been there since 1894.

And you may observe a curious exchange of energy

I just finished my daily reading of the running of polvo story...and upon checking the websites, notes, and recorded conversations, a couple of facts have bubbled up:1: I counted all the people that ran and finished and find that my calculations put polvo at 650 place and not 612 as stated in earlier correspondence. This may be a typo, computer quirk on different results websites, or a deliberate attempt to misrepresent the facts. I am not judging.2. I notice that some bib numbers from the race were strictly numerical and some (such as polvo's) had what appear to be the alpha characters "HO"...I am thinking there is some type of Divinci code message buried in this fact that needs to be explored.3. It did not fully dawn on me the significance of the polvo place finish (top 94.4308% if we are to accept polvo's word; top 94.085% if my calculations are correct...perhaps Leopold could weigh in on the numbers?)..but for a novice runner to compete with seasoned veterans and actually finish ahead of 95% (please note this percentage is rounded up) of the runners is amazing. The mere fact that he finished is something to ponder...the odds of him kicking ass like that are unbelievable. This is the equivalent of: someone saying hey I think I can drive in the NASCAR races....taking their Honda Accord down to the track, qualifying, and then finishing 5th in the Daytona 500...(43 cars start in the race)....I mean this is really a remarkable feat to go from couch potato ( I am guessing) to world class 1/2 marathon runner in a few months!!!! My hat is off to polvo!!!!PS: I think we should all do a pinkie finger promise to meet one year from now (at a location equal distance from all of our homes) and run/walk a ½ marathon.